THE OVERHEARD SERIES60707

"Colin, you should have listened to me in 2000. If you had joined the Democratic Party as the candidate for Secretary of Defense in the Gore ticket, George Bush would now be a filthy rich oilman but the nation would be fiscally sane, loved and admired by everyone and really safe!"

President Clinton smiled as he said these words to Colin Powell. He then poured more of that delightful Chambolle Mussingy in both their glasses and waited for Colin Powell's reply:

"I guess I should have, Mister President. We probably would not be in the holy mess we are in! I must assume a large share of the blame"

"Right! " exclaimed the ex-President, while he raised his glass of wine. He let Powell drink and then sat back and looked at Powell intensely.

Clinton said:

"As we were saying, you are largely responsible for the present chaos and must be punished"

"You must be joking Mister President!"

"I am not. Try walking after having drunk that wine!"

THE OVERHEARD SERIES 60707

A humorous anecdote sometimes helps dispell the lassitude of hot summer days. Here is one:

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says,

"I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.."


The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me."


As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, "I would like to buy you a drink, too."


The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water."

"Coming up," says the bartender.


As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, "I would like to buy you one, too."


The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water."


"Coming right up," the bartender says.


As he gives her the drink, he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?"

The old woman replies,


"Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue."

THE OVERHEARD SERIES 51206

A MEDAL FOR KARL?

Karl Rove

“Karl, I hate to see you sitting in your big chair in front of your desk and spend hours looking out the window with that distant look in your beady eyes!”

“What do you want me to do, Mister President? Everyone is against me!”

“Well, you had it coming. You know, Doctor Phil always says that the fruit of self confidence is arrogance but that arrogance is really an expression of pusillanimity, whatever that is. He says that its unhappy results involve poor digestion and a touch of impotence. He also says that plotting and cooking up schemes taxes not only the brain but also darkens the soul, whichever comes first. Perhaps you should see a psycho doctor”

“You mean a psychiatrist.”

“Whatever. Besides you are running out of brilliant ideas and clever solutions. Even Scott McClellan comes up with good lies and beautiful smoke curtains. That kid is going places. But before the media notices your present condition we can perhaps arrange for an ambassadorship in some quiet place like Andorra, Burkina Faso or Belize where you can help the natives embrace freedom and democracy. You know, diplomatic status will probably keep you out of jail. .”

Old Karl listened to the Boss with some apprehension. He could not help feeling terribly jealous of Scott and disappointed that his razor sharp inventiveness seemed to have deserted him. Worse, he was about to be discarded like an old set of false teeth. Tears were already at the edge of his limpid orbs and he felt that another derogatory comment from the President, his idol, would produce an unstoppable flow of tears and another wave of heartache and anxiety. In a low voice he said:

“Is there anything you can do other than send me away?”

“How about a medal, Karl?”